Author Archives: Anoushka Roy

Darkness.
3 am and paralytic nightmares.
Flashes of emotions
Voices blending together.
“Worthless”
“Waste of space”
“All your fault”
I cannot be less than what they expect—
Perfection.
In. Out. In. Out.
The breaths get shorter.
My eyes are stinging but I’ve run out of tears.
Trembling. Shivering.
I am empty, cold inside-out.
But it’s unbearably hot.
Every single orifice in my body weeping sweat.
Gasp. Pain.
Fingernails digging into my palms.
It grounds me
Yet my throat keeps on screaming.
Am I sick? No I can’t be.
Throw up and move on.
Monsters crawling, screaming in my head
Taking over me.
I don’t know how to stop them anymore.
In. Out. In.
Why is there no oxygen?
I’m not collapsing.
It’s just the embrace of black, all black.
Darkness.
3 am and my anxiety.

Burning hearts, bleeding words,

Morality hides in shame.

For the Earth is the boiling pit of Hell,

And the devils have won this game. 

The angels fought long and hard,

But it’s easier to let the devils win.

Lucifer is setting up a new kingdom,

So it’s just easier to be wicked, to sin.

Corrupt minds and darkened souls,

Tearing all remaining innocence apart.

With every trace of goodwill leaving the Earth,

The reign of Satan will soon start.

Nothing is left but tears and anger.

Has all happiness left the Earth for good?

Shadows of death and doom lurk in the corners,

As Satan rises where once God stood.

Respect and love are made of gold here,

And of a beggar’s scraps, an honest man’s woes.

For the kings of the world may sin as they please,

But it’s the oppressed that have to bear the blows. 

Earth is a desert, a battle-field,

Where the devils remain victorious.

For to the mortal eyes, good deeds lack lusture,

But the temptation of sin seems glorious.

So Hell has been abandoned for now,

As the devils bring to life our worst fears.

Earth is not the abode of humanity anymore,

Hell is empty, and all the devils are here.